What is the best way to be happy? How does one win at life? Is the old bumper sticker, “He who has the most toys wins” right? In the popular musical, Wicked, the character, Fiyero, has an answer that may seem appealing and is in many ways reinforced by our entertainment-based society. He sings this […]
Be Like Water
As the end of the year approaches, many of us are prone to consider how this year has unfolded and what we’d like to do differently in the coming year. For many that might mean improving in a skill for work or learning a new skill for a personal hobby. But that begs the question […]
Better to forget? How to move forward from a painful past
In the 2004 movie, Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind, the main character Joel (played by Jim Carrey) finds out that his girlfriend has undergone a procedure to have all her memories of him erased after the two get into an argument and break up. Realizing she no longer knows him and looking for a […]
Problem Solving Therapy
When faced with a problem what is the first thing you do? For some whether it is in the business world or personal life, we might set a goal. For some we have learned how to use the SMART goals system. SMART goals are specific, measurable, achievable, realistic, and timely. The point of the acronym […]
The Apocalypse of Sport
When most people hear the word “apocalypse” they may think the end of the world, fire and brimstone, plagues, warfare and all kinds of destruction. But the word, which is Greek, actually means to pull back or reveal. The beauty of sport and competition is that for many of us, it is a place where […]
Discipline, Virtue, and Addiction Part III
Addiction: Disease, Moral Failing, or something else? In previous posts I’ve discussed a major challenge we face in today’s society, namely how to navigate the overwhelming access to easy short-lived pleasures that actually work against our long-term happiness. These choices often highjack our pursuit, pleasure and reward circuits in the brain and our bodies compensate […]
Discipline, Virtue, and Addiction Part II
Philosophical Foundations: Why I don’t do what I know is good for me sometimes A key idea that the self-control advocates out there make (whether or not they use this language) is to understand and differentiate first order desires from second order desires. Basically, this is a way to think about how we can have […]
Discipline, Virtue, and Addiction Part I
The Problem and Modern Solution. “I really want that cookie” (I say to myself), “No I don’t. I want to stay away from desserts for now”. How many of us have struggled between various desires in our lives? Part of me really wants that cookie, the other part of me wants to stay disciplined and […]
Understanding our Emotions
What is an emotion anyway? Modern psychologists have offered several theories to explain what exactly qualifies as an emotion. While we all have them it can be difficult to define what an emotion is without having to use a placeholder, like “feeling” to describe the emotion. A general modern consensus however is that emotions are […]
Good Stress?
For many of us we go through periods of life that are more stressful than others. Maybe that is due to struggles at work, a health issue, a relationship on the rocks, the loss of a loved one…You get the point. There are all kinds of things in our lives that produce stress. But not […]